Celebrating the 12 nights of Christmas (German “Rauhnächte”) with children

Christmas is a time when Christians all over the world are celebrating. However, very few people are aware that the 25th of December also marks the beginning of 12 magical nights, known as “Rauhnächte”. Traditionally, the ancient Germanic lunar calendar only included 354 days – leaving a period of 12 nights that marked the transition between the years. The “Rauhnächte” (translated as ‘rough nights’) were seen as a time for reflection and rituals.

This is also a wonderful time to celebrate with children and to teach them about natural cycles. Together you can observe how even feelings that we experience as dark and heavy are eventually replaced by lighter, more joyful emotions. All flows and changes in eternal rhythms. Here are some ideas for reflections that you can journal about each day. It’s traditional to burn some herbs while you do this, but you can also just light a candle and burn an incense stick.

1st Rauhnacht: Take some time to think about what responsibility means to you. Was there a time in the past year, when you did not take responsibility for yourself? Did you lie about something to avoid responsibility? When did you act responsible and truthful? This is not about judgement, it’s about compassionate self-inquiry. If you have children, you can talk to them about how this is different.

2nd Rauhnacht: Today’s reflection is about pain. Did you feel hurt by events or people this year? Did you hurt others through words or actions? What might bring healing to your pain? Take some time to reflect and journal about these questions. See, if you can let go of the pain you experienced.

3rd Rauhnacht: How authentically do you live your life? Do you sometimes say or do things that don’t really express how you actually feel or think? If so, take some time to think about why you didn’t show yourself as you are. Was it fear, pride, addiction or some kind of agenda?

4th Rauhnacht: Do you sometimes feel lost, without any idea how to go on? Especially when we can’t see a clear path in front of us, it might be helpful to just focus on the next step. By doing this, we can also be a great role model for children in that we teach them how to stay calm and focused in difficult or chaotic situations. Today, just keep focused on the present moment and try to stay curious about little things you might experience throughout the day.

5th Rauhnacht: How do you currently live your life? Is there something missing? Do you feel somebody else has to say or do something for you to be happy? Today, take some time to think about things only you can do that make yourself happy. Be generous. Sometimes it’s also helpful to write down things you’re already grateful for. You can also practice this with children.

6th Rauhnacht: When you think about your life, is there something that you’d like to have more of? If you could create anything you’d like, what would you do? Imagine you’re an artist and the year ahead of you is a blank canvas – what would you paint? What colours would you use? Maybe you want to create an actual artwork today and hang it up your wall as a reminder. Children also love this kind of activity.

7th Rauhnacht: Tonight just take a break, breathe and enjoy the stars or fireworks.

8th Rauhnacht: There might be days when you feel desperate and your life feels dark and bleak. In times like that it might be helpful to light a fire for yourself. You can light the fire physically in form of a candle. You can also start by journaling and then think about what would make your situation a little bit more bearable. Is there anything that makes you hopeful?

9th Rauhnacht: Who are you when you’re all by yourself? If there is nobody else to interact with and talk to – what’s going on in your head? How do you communicate with yourself? Take some time for yourself and write down your thoughts as they pass through.

10th Rauhnacht: Do you have vision for what you want to do with your life? What do imagine and what inspires you on your journey? Maybe you just want to close your eyes and dream tonight.

11th Rauhnacht: Today is the second last Rauhnacht. The time of transition is coming to an end, while we are fully arriving in the new year. Think about what you want to take with you. A good idea can be to focus on things that bring you joy. Write down all the moments of happiness that come to your mind.

12th Rauhnacht: Today is the last Rauhnacht. What insights did you have over the past 12 days? Can you carry some of them forward into your daily life? The darkest nights of the year are coming to an end. Today we celebrate new beginnings.